Month: May 2014

And now for something completely different…

Posted on



We’ve been incommunicado for a few months due to the rigors of school and work,

but now that summer is almost here we’re planning to post a little more regularly.

As a little taste of things to come, here’s a little piece we put together a few years ago.

We hope you dig.


Song:  No One Wears Helmets in Portland

Scene: A street in Portland, whereon many cyclists can be seen pedaling.

Chorus: No one wears helmets in Portland!
We’re far too busy looking cool!!
Cyclist 1: We’d rather suffer bruises,
Cyclist 2: Or other physical abuses!!
Cyclist 3: Instead of looking like a total tool!

Chorus: So no one wears helmets in Portland!
Those who do are a psychotic bunch of squares!!
Cyclist 4: Subdermal hematomas,
Cyclist 5: Or even a coma!!
Cyclist 6: Are more preferable to messing with our hair!!

Chorus: Yes, no one wears helmets in Portland!
Traffic laws don’t apply to us!!
Cyclist 7: Cars yield to us you see,
Lest we gesture menacingly,
Or cross our arms, pout, and make a fuss!!

Chorus: No one wears helmets in Portland!
It’s an expression of individuality!
Cyclist 8: I’m protected by my beard!
Cyclist 9: I’m keeping Portland weird,
Even if I become a casualty!

Chorus: No one wears helmets in Portland!
We won’t come to such a grisly end!
Cyclist 10: I can’t talk on my phone,
Wearing this unwieldy dome,
Or message on facebook with my friends!!




The Complete Headcase Crew